Bloggers NOT Supporting Other Bloggers
The Cattiness is Real
When it comes to the blogging industry, there's a lot of bitches. Just being honest. If you're in the industry, you know this is the case. Women like to pick sides, and they like to be non-inclusive. This is something I am genuinely against to the core. I like to include everyone, and I like to respond to all (legitimate) DMs and messages on social media. Especially on Instagram, and this is something I have a hard time with because a lot of girls do not respond to other bloggers and their audience. If you don't read messages and interact, then can you really call yourself an influencer? You have to engage with those who engage with you.
I've been in this industry for 5 1/2 years. Back in January of 2013, I didn't know exactly what I was getting myself in to, and therefore, I was so willing to help everyone I encountered. Knowing what I know now, I don't want to help rude and mean individuals. Not to mention frauds. I was on a recent press trip with one of my favorite brands (of all time) and I was just so honored to be on the trip. There were only 12 girls from the US, and I was one of them which was seriously insane. Anyway, one of the girls was so rude and stuck up. The entire time I thought she had to take a massive shit, or she wasn't feeling well. After 2 days, I just realized she was rude and snobby. It had nothing to do with her well-being, and she expected to be treated like a princess. Simply because she had 1 million followers, but unfortunately after I looked at her following, most of her likes were from spammy accounts. She also didn't get enough likes to get 2-4% engagement which is the average for an influencer to be considered serious. Having less than 1% engagement across posts is a red flag. Everything pointed to fraud to me, but I would never go to someone with that because you can never be 100% sure.
Recently someone I had followed for years came to mind, and I tried to find her on Instagram. Turns out she had blocked me, and I can only imagine for one reason. My growth mechanism on Instagram. I give away a lot, and I want to reward my audience. Everyone who chooses to follow along will have a chance to win makeup, fashion pieces and so much more. I like to bring brands onboard to give products away to you, and I also share the PR goodies I receive. Not to mention I do giveaways with other bloggers. This is something the industry is torn about, because some girls only want to be friends with those who grew "organically" and never did a giveaway in their life. To each their own. We all run our businesses differently, and that's okay. There's no right or wrong.
Another element I've noticed is that girls tend to become friends only with those that go on the same trips as them. This is definitely something that creates a huge divide. Some girls are always taken on trips with the same brands, so they only spend time with specific creators over the years. This creates a clique, so to some degree a lot of brands are creating these cliques based on who they consistently invite on press trips. It's incredible to have diversity in the space, and invite different people over time. Some brands are doing this right, but most are definitely not. This is just my opinion, and I expressed my opinion to some of my favorite brands when they disappointed me with their recent choices for press trips. You all definitely agreed with me on this topic.
The third and most simplistic reasoning that the industry is not inclusive, is something I've mentioned before. It's girls just not liking other girls for various reasons. Jealousy is the biggest one I've noticed. I recently heard from one of my friends that several bloggers she's been following for years (who know her and vice versa) did not acknowledge her presence at all at a conference. That genuinely makes me sick to my stomach. Pretending you don't know someone when you definitely do? Of course, sometimes it's an honest mistake but when you're met someone in person before, attended local events with them...pretending not to know them is disgusting.
While I mention this is the blogging industry, this is likely most industries. Women can be the most amazing supportive people in this world, but we can be the exact opposite. Today, my goal is to inspire you to be more inclusive. Help out a fellow blogger, and be kind not just to other people in your industry, but to all people. Everyone is going through struggles of their own. Be a light.
"You know I always like to keep it real, and this is why I share the good and the bad about the industry."
While it's incredible, and I've met some of my best friends in this space (looking at you Tonya!) there is a lot of things that get swept under the rug. My goal is to share information and answer questions for anyone who wants to know more. Many of you have asked me questions about giveaways, growth, writing and everything else involved in blogging. So many of you have asked me to write a long PDF style (almost a book) of all the things I've learned over the years. Some of the girls in the space do not want anyone else to do well because they feel threatened, so they refuse to share information like that. There's space for all of us. Not to mention this is going to become a 5 billion dollar industry. We don't need to be competitive, mean and non-inclusive of one another. We should be building eachother up and helping one another day to day.
I don't know how many times I have to say it, but just because you got a collaboration or got invited on a press trip, does not make you better than anyone. If anything, it should humble you and make you thankful for the life you lead. In my opinion, it should help you get other girls inspired and motivated to work harder to get the opportunities you do. The more you bring other bloggers up, the more real friendships and relationships you will make. We all succeed when we help one another.
A few of my favorite inclusive Facebook groups include The Skinny Confidential secret Facebook group. So many women are commenting and asking for advice each and every single day. It's such an amazing community, no doubt about that. There's also no judging and everyone comes together to answer questions. There's an amazing Brunch Babes Tucson group that allows women in Tucson to come together, over the meal we all love: brunch! Finally Tucson Blog Baes is my favorite at the moment. It's small, but it's just so nice to have an amazing group of local bloggers to bounce ideas off of, and work together to further our careers as bloggers.