More Lessons on Love

StarrPass Weekend Resort

This photo was taken at the J.W. Starrpass Resort here in Tucson, Arizona. It is (and most likely will always be) my favorite resort in town. My boyfriend and I love going here for staycations.

More Lessons on Love

May 10, 2017

Love Has Its Hardships

The last time we chatted about love (romantic love to be precise) was back in November, when I shared 8 lessons I've learned. 

While those lessons were excellent, I have really gotten to a whole other level when it comes to my relationship. Yes, some of you may not even know I have a boyfriend. That's okay, because he doesn't like to be on camera. He likes his privacy and doesn't share his life with the world quite like I do. He doesn't have a Facebook, Twitter, etc. He has an Instagram because he wanted to follow along on my trips, and he also wanted to support my sponsored work (such a sweetheart.) Having said all of this, you can imagine the conversations we've had about him not wanting to be on camera with me. At first I was upset, because this is what I want to do with my career. I want to be on camera, in photos, on Insta stories, Snapchat, etc. He doesn't. In the early stages of our relationship, this definitely bothered me and caused turmoil. Nowadays, it feels natural and to be honest, most men do not want to be on camera. They're fine with taking photos of their significant others, but they don't necessarily want to be on camera on display for the world. 

You have to be accepting of one another. 

If you're not accepting of each other's preferences, beliefs and feelings, the relationship will definitely have a lot of rockiness. You can't force someone to do something they clearly do not want to do. Leave it be. After a few years, my boyfriend has gotten more comfortable with being on camera and even mentions it on his own now (!!!), but people need to do this on their own time. If you force someone into something, the chances of them resenting you down the road will significantly increase. Why make someone you love miserable? It's really not that big of a deal if he doesn't want to be in many photos. I still get my holiday shots 😉

Smiling in Morilee

The photo above was taken by my boyfriend while I was rocking a gorgeous Morilee wedding dress for a particular campaign. Now this leads me into my next point. While you need to be accepting of each other's feelings, try not push limits too far. 

Be conscientious of your words & actions.

One thing I do a lot is tease, and while it's all fun and games, if I'm teasing 15 hours a day at some point that shit gets real old real quick and can cause problems. When you think about the exchanges you have with your significant other, make sure you're not constantly picking on them, degrading them, teasing them or just being an overall dick. Sometimes I push it to the limit, and someone needs to tell me to shut the f*** up and stop being so annoying or negative. Don't worry. Most of us do this at some point, but the goal is only to tease in a fun and lively scenario. Not in stressful situations and not ALL the time. Being conscientious of actions and words is huge in any relationship, whether it's a friend, boyfriend, aunt, or your mom. 

I'm able to write about these items because I have gone through them, and the emotions and hardships have flowed through me. I'm hoping to save you the heartache and turmoil.

The one thing I still struggle with from time to time is insecurity. I think most of us can attest to this (if not, I don't believe you!) no matter how comfortable your man or woman makes you feel (and you have absolutely no reason to doubt a thing they say) it is almost human nature to get insecure or jealous. Don't let those emotions come to the surface, because they will cause more problems in your relationship than they're worth. Your insecurities are yours and yours alone. Your man is not out with his secretary - that's the shit we see in the media and assume it's us in those scenarios. Always be open and honest, and if there's a particular action that you're not a fan of with your significant other, bring it to their attention. Bring it up logically, and not emotionally. Emotions can be such a bitch. Try your best to overcome them in times of weakness when you want to accuse someone of doing something.

What're your recommendations? What lessons have you learned since my last post? I'd love to know in the comments!

Chilling at Starrpass Resort

Also, before you go I wanted to tell you that I've partnered with JW Marriott to give one of you a free stay!

The prize is a 3 night JW Marriott Stay or The JW Marriott Mattress & Box Spring. Both of which I'd love to win, but make sure to click this link and enter to win. JW Marriotts are actually my favorite properties to stay at (I love our local one in town and every single one I've ever stayed in!) Have you stayed at a JW before? #curatedbyjw

Please refer to JW Marriott's rules and regulations for this content, and of course good luck! 

This is a gorgeous sunset image within a JW Marriott.